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about

My seventh collection of Theme Music collaborations dating from August 2016 through January 2017. I'm kinda surprised just how well these songs turned out, given the amount of stress I was under during the recording to these songs. The results of the 2016 election, losing my job right after the election, getting hospitalized, losing my insurance, my girlfriend then lost her job, and then I decided to publicly propose to her on stage, married my girlfriend, had to deal with regular collector calls and shut off notices. Here it is at the end of January 2017, and I finally found a new job and I start tomorrow! Yay! For such a dark period, these songs absolutely were what kept me going. Well, that and my wife Moira! Oh, and thanks of course to Theme Music for being there and all the wonderful musicians from Theme Music that collaborated on so many of these songs! I absolutely could NOT have done this without you!

credits

released January 25, 2017

Kyle Richards, John Pecak, Carey Anne, Chris Henderson, Dave Thake, David K. Wallis, Zoenda McIntosh, Mark McRite, Owen Hodgson, Bobby Phillipps, Katrina Maxwell, Lee Wiggins, Matt Brown, Bill Shaouy, Pete McDade, Martin Burch, John Fremer, Kris Hauch, James Goodfellow, Shane O'Donnell, Steve Della Maggiora, Keith Marshall, Scott Roberts, Gary Maher, Scott Sutherland, Torbjorn Petersson, Keith Klingensmith, Edward Bradley, Lynsey Moon, and Christian Lipski

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Kyle Richards and the Theme Music Collective Ferndale, Michigan

Collaborations made with musicians from Theme Music.

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Track Name: Academy Fight Song (Mission of Burma)
Walk into my room
Ask me jerky questions
Don't mean what you say
Immaculate Conception
Play by the rules
So close to the chest, chest
Show that all's not lost
And this is not a test.

Stay just as far from me as me from you.
Make sure that you are sure of everything I do.
'Cause I'm not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not
Your academy

The halls are like piss
The rooms are underlit
Still it must be nice
Such a perfect fit, fit
What's that I hear?
The sound of marching feet
It has a strange allure,
Has a strange allure

Stay just as far from me as me from you.
Make sure that you are sure of everything I do.
'Cause I'm not, not, not, not, not, not, not, not
Your academy
Your academy

Maybe you're right,
I shouldn't judge
What's wrong or right,
It's all too much
I'm not judging you,
I'm judging me.
My academy.
Your academy
My academy.
Your academy
Track Name: Circus Envy (R.E.M.)
Here comes that awful feeling again
Welcome the ugly animal
I hold my breath to watch you swing,
My pyro ba-ba-ball and chain,
I'm not afraid, I messed it, messed it, messed it, messed it up

I've got my telescope head in the haystack
I'm getting tired of your dodgeball circus act
Put pepper in my coffee, I forgot to bark on command

Here comes that awful feeling again
Make way for monster jealousy
The strong man kicked sand into my breakfast cereal bowl
I'd spelled your name with Oatios,
He messed it, messed it, messed it, messed it up

I've got my telescope head in the haystack
I am tired of your dodgeball circus act
Put pepper in my coffee, I forgot to bark on command

(You're mean, mean, mean
You tease, tease, tease me)

If I were you I'd really run from me
I'd really, really wish that I were you
When I get loose, I'll climb a tree
And drop a load on your head
This monster in me makes me retch, you messed it, messed it up

I've got my telescope head in the haystack
I am jealous of your dodgeball circus act
Put pepper in my coffee, I forgot to bark
Put pepper in my coffee, I forgot to bark on command

(You're mean, mean, mean
You tease, tease, tease me)

Do you smell jealousy?
Do you smell jealousy, jealousy, jealousy?
Track Name: Restraining Order Blues (eels)
Life goes on
Nothing is new
Judge made it clear
I can't be near you
Everybody knows that I'm not a violent man
Just someone who knows he's in love

I made mistakes
Everyone does
Don't know why I did
I guess just because
No one gets through to me the way that you do
Now I know I'm in love

Baby, it's a little much
To never touch you
When I know I'll never
Find another love like this

Life goes on
Nothing is new
Passing the days
Thinking 'bout you
Everybody knows that I'm not a violent man
Just someone who knows he's in love
Track Name: Binky the Doormat (R.E.M.)
This is horror movie stuff
The muffin is peach, you're "makin" love'
You mean this opera involves handcuffs?
I lay defeated
Yeah, sour milk mouth, horseradish sweet
She's a girl and she's loving me
But distance is my tendency
I am defeated

Have you lost your place? (go away, go away)
I wore my doormat face (go away, go away, go away, go, go, go)
I hung my this or that (go away, go away, go away, go away)
I laid my welcome mat (go away, go away)

If I'm your oyster, where's the war?
You leave me gasping, tattered and torn
I know you can't find a fork
I am just a little acorn
Well, acorns grow to mighty trees
You've got sauce, but you don't have knees
Now look who's asking pretty please
I lay defeated

Have you lost your place? (go away, go away)
I wore my doormat face (go away, go away, go away, go, go, go)
I hung my this or that (go away, go away, go away, go away)
I laid my welcome mat (go away, go away)

Call your bathroom friends around
I will fake a little frown
I will be your little clown,
Easily defeated
Yeah, shut the door and open wide
Seconal and astroglide
Fuck with me and traumatize
Don't you see I love your hide?
All the beauty that's trapped inside
Can't you see I love your hide?
Can't you see I love your hide?
Can't you see it?

Have you lost your place? (go away, go away)
I wore my doormat face (go away, go away, go away, go, go, go)
I hung my this or that (go away, go away, go away, go away)
I laid my welcome mat (go away, go away, go away, go, go, go)
I hung my this or that (go away, go away, go away, go away)
I laid my welcome mat (go away, go away, go away, go, go, go)
Go away, go away, go away
Go away, go away, go away
Track Name: Orange Crush (R.E.M.)
I've got my spine, I've got my orange crush
(Collar me, don't collar me)
I've got my spine, I've got my orange crush
(We are agents of the free)
I've had my fun and now it's time
To serve your conscience overseas (over me, not over me)
Coming in fast, over me
Track Name: Living Well is the Best Revenge (R.E.M.)
It's only when your poison spins into the life you'd hoped to live
That suddenly you wake up in a shaking panic, wow!
You set me up like a lamb to slaughter
Garbo as a farmer's daughter
Unbelievable, the gospel according to who?
I lay right down.

All your sad and lost apostles
Hum my name and flare their nostrils
Choking on the bones you toss to them
Well I'm not one to sit and spin
Cause living wells the best revenge
Baby, I am calling you on that

Don't turn your talking points on me,
History will set me free
The future's ours and you don't even read the footnote now!
So who's chasing you? Where did you go?
You disappeared mid-sentence
In a judgment crisis I see my anecdote for it
You weakened shell

All your sad and lost apostles
Hum my name and flare their nostrils
Choking on the bones you toss to them
Well I'm not one to sit and spin
Cause living wells the best revenge
Baby, I am calling you on that

You savor your dying breath
Well, I forgive but I don't forget
You work it out, let's hear that argument again
Camera three, go now!

All your sad and lost apostles
Hum my name and flare their nostrils
Choking on the bones you toss to them
Well I'm not one to sit and spin
Cause living wells the best revenge
Baby, I am calling you on that

Baby, I am calling you on that
Baby, I am calling you on
Track Name: A Wolf At The Door (Radiohead)
Drag him out your window
Dragging out the dead
Singing I miss you
Snakes and ladders flip the lid
Out pops the cracker
Smacks you in the head
Knives you in the neck
Kicks you in the teeth
Steel toe caps
Takes all your credit cards
Get up get the gunge
Get the eggs
Get the flan in the face
The flan in the face
The flan in the face
Dance you fucker dance you fucker
Don't you dare
Don't you dare
Don't you flan in the face
Take it with the love its given
Take it with a pinch of salt
Take it to the tax man
Let me back
Let me back
I promise to be good
Don't look in the mirror at the face you don't recognize
Help me, call the doctor, put me inside
Put me inside
Put me inside
Put me inside
Put me inside

I keep the wolf from the door
But he calls me up
Calls me on the phone
Tells me all the ways that he's gonna mess me up
Steal all my children if I don't pay the ransom
And I'll never see them again if I squeal to the cops

Walking like giant cranes
Ahh with my X-ray eyes I strip you naked
In a tight little world
Now you're on the list?
Stepford wives who are we to complain?
Investments and dealers
Investments and dealers
Cold wives and mistresses
Cold wives and Sunday papers city
Boys in first class don't their born in a
Someone else is gonna come and clean it up
Born and raised for the job
Someone always does
I wish you'd get up get over
Get up get over and turn the tape off

I keep the wolf from the door
But he calls me up
Calls me on the phone
Tells me all the ways that he's gonna mess me up
Steal all my children if I don't pay the ransom
And I'll never see them again if I squeal to the cops

So I'm just gonna
Track Name: Eye of Fatima (Camper van Beethoven)
He's got the Eye of Fatima on the wall of his room
Two bottles of tequila, three cats and a broom
He's got an 18-year-old angel and she's all dressed in black
He's got 15 nickles of cocaine tied up in a sack

And this here's a government experiment and we're driving like Hell
To give some cowboys some acid and to stay in motels
We're going to eat up some wide open spaces
Like it was a cruise on the Nile
Take the hands off the clock, we're going to be here a while

And I am the Eye of Fatima on the wall of the motel room
And cowboys on acid are like Egyptian cartoons
And no one ever conquered Wyoming from the left or from the right
But you can stay in motel rooms and stay up all night
Track Name: Harborcoat (R.E.M.)
They crowded up to Lenin with their noses worn off
A handshake is worthy if it's all that you've got
Metal shivs on wood push through our back
There's a splinter in your eye and it reads "REACT"

They shifted the statues for harboring ghosts
Reddened their necks collared their clothes
When we ditched the books with the middles cut out
She gathered the corners and called it her gown

Find my harborcoat, can't go outside without it
Find my harborcoat, can't go outside without it

They crowded up to Lenin with their noses worn off
A handshake is worthy if it's all that you've got
Metal shivs on wood push through our back
There's a splinter in your eye and it reads "REACT", R-E-A-C-T

They shifted the statues for harboring ghosts
Reddened their necks, collared their clothes
When we ditched the books with the middles cut out
She gathered the corners and called it her gown

She said
Track Name: Oliver's Army (Elvis Costello)
Don't start that talking
I could talk all night
My mind goes sleepwalking
While I'm putting the world to rights
Call careers information
Have you got yourself an occupation?

Oliver's army is here to stay
Oliver's army are on their way
And I would rather be anywhere else
But here today

There was a Checkpoint Charlie
He didn't crack a smile
But it's no laughing party
When you've been on the murder mile
All it takes is one itchy trigger
One more widow, one less white nigger

Oliver's Army is here to stay
Oliver's army are on their way
And I would rather be anywhere else
But here today

Hong Kong is up for grabs
London is full of Arabs
We could be in Palestine
Overrun by a Chinese line
With the boys from the Mersey and the Thames and the Tyne
But there's no danger
It's a professional career
Though it could be arranged
With just a word in Mr. Churchill's ear
If you're out of luck or out of work
We could send you to Johannesburg

Oliver's Army is here to stay
Oliver's army are on their way
And I would rather be anywhere else
But here today
And I would rather be anywhere else
But here today
And I would rather be anywhere else
But here today
Oh-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh
Oh-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh
Track Name: Like Soldiers Do (Billy Bragg)
Blues eyes fighting the grey eyes fighting the tears
Armed to the teeth for a war of words
Reaching all the years
I advanced across a poppy field
I saw the gleam as you raised your shield
And love screamed down
With the sun behind its back

Our Fathers were all soldiers,
Shall we be soldiers too
Fighting and falling like soldiers do

Nothing is clear in this tactical unclear war
I can't be bothered to find out
What we are fighting for
No one can win this war of the senses
I see no reason to drop my defenses
So stand fast my emotions,
Rally round my shaking heart

Our Fathers were all soldiers,
Shall we be soldiers too
Fighting and falling like soldiers do

Blue eyes fighting the gray eyes fighting the tears
Armed to the teeth for a war of words
Reaching all the years
I advanced across a poppy field
I saw the gleam as you raised your shield
And love screamed down
With the sun behind its back
I knew once again I was under attack
So stand fast my emotions,
Rally round my shaking heart

Our Fathers were all soldiers,
Shall we be soldiers too
Fighting and falling like soldiers
Fighting and falling like soldiers
Fighting and falling like soldiers do
Track Name: Cry Baby Cry (The Beatles)
Cry baby cry
Make your mother sigh
She's old enough to know better.

The king of Marigold was in the kitchen
Cooking breakfast for the queen
The queen was in the parlor
Playing piano for the children of the king.

Cry baby cry
Make your mother sigh
She's old enough to know better
So cry baby cry.

The king was in the garden
Picking flowers for a friend who came to play
The queen was in the playroom
Painting pictures for the children's holiday.

Cry baby cry
Make your mother sigh
She's old enough to know better
So cry baby cry.

The duchess of Kircaldy always smiling
And arriving late for tea
The duke was having problems
With a message at the local bird and bee.

Cry baby cry
Make your mother sigh
She's old enough to know better
So cry baby cry.

At twelve o'clock a meeting round the table
For a seance in the dark
With voices out of nowhere
Put on specially by the children for a lark.

Cry baby cry
Make your mother sigh
She's old enough to know better
So cry baby cry cry cry cry baby
Make your mother sigh.
She's old enough to know better
Cry baby cry
cry cry cry
Make your mother sigh
She's old enough to know better
So cry baby cry.
Track Name: Ten Years (Paul Simon)
You are moving on a crowded street
Through various shades of people
In the summer’s harshest heat
A story in your eye

Well, speak until your mind is at ease

Ten years come and gone so fast
I might as well have been dreaming
Sunny days have burned a path
Across another season

A fortune rises to the sky

Ten years come and gone so fast
I might as well have been dreaming

You are driving down an empty road
Beside a shady river
When the sky turns dark as stone
And the trees begin to shiver

The Grace of God is nigh

Ten years come and gone
And that flash has never been forgotten
Sunny days have burned a path
Across another season

How do the powerless survive?

Ten years come and gone so fast
I might as well have been dreaming

If you look into your future life
Ten years from this question
Do you imagine a familiar light
Burning in the distance?

The love that never dies
Ten years come and gone so fast
I might as well have been dreaming
Sunny days have burned a path
Across another season

Ten years come and gone so fast
Sunny days have burned a path
Track Name: Molasses (Radiohead)
Shake hands, genocide, molasses
Jet powered caravans, molasses
I’m too good, you’re stuck on
Rent free earthquake zone, molasses

I need someone else’s glasses
Starving waitresses in plasters
Fat houseflies, genocide
We’ve been stitched up, molasses
Track Name: Bonfire Blondes (Beck)
I'm so weary of taking up space
Sending junk mail to the whole human race
Stole my genome from the salt of the earth
Weighed my brain for to see what it's worth
Lights out, they're throwing blondes at the bonfire
Beauty's burning but my backbone feels so cold

Little girl with the protean hands
White lightning that she got from Japan
Fingernails on the tasergun
Mannequins just melt in the sun
Say hello, they're throwing blondes at the bonfire
Plastic melts, but souls only wear away

La la la la la la la la
La la la la la la la la
La la la la la la la la
La la la la la la la la

Now the bonfire's burning my face
Generic rails that I like to deface
Landladies turn to pillars of salt
Like missile silos where the alpha males go
Bombs away, they're throwing blondes at the bonfire
From the ashes, all that's left is a heart of stone

La la la la la la la la
La la la la la la la la
La la la la la la la la
La la la la la la la la
Track Name: Strange Invitation (Beck)
I've been drifting along in the same stale shoes
Loose ends tyin' a noose in the back of my mind
If you thought that you were making your way
To where the puzzles and pagans lay
I'll put it together, it's a strange invitation

When I wake up, someone will sweep up my lazy bones
And we will rise in the cool of the evening
I remember the way that you smiled
When the gravity shackles were wild
Something is vacant when I think it's all beginning

And I've been drifting along in the same stale shoes
Loose ends tyin' a noose in the back of my mind
If you thought that you were making your way
To where the puzzles and pagans lay
Put it together, it's a strange invitation

It's a strange invitation, it's a strange invitation
It's a strange invitation, it's a strange invitation
Track Name: Revolution (R.E.M.)
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Your revolution is a silly idea, yeah
All your friends are feeling sad
It's like you need a reason to be feeling bad, yeah
You sport an armband when your good and mad, yeah

(chorus)
La, la, la, la revolution (the future never happened)
La, la, la, la revolution

I don't know why I'm feeling bad, yeah
I picked up a bad vibration
Gulliani's on all the news shows
Ban the electoral college
Donald Trump is the president elect
The Russians got him elected
Black man can't get acquitted
Of the crimes that we committed
The future never happened, it never happened

La, la, la, la revolution (the future never happened)
La, la, la, la, I picked up a bad vibration

Your revolution is a silly idea, yeah
You tried to look like a punk rock girl
A whole lotta sneer, and little curl
I don't have time for your theatrics
Everybody knows that you're a bad actress
We've been sorry for great too long, yeah
But a scum is rising, yeah

(repeat chorus 2x)
Track Name: Furry Happy Monsters (R.E.M.)
Furry happy monsters laughing
Monsters having fun,
Happy, happy
See them jump and run.
Happy, happy
laughing all the while
Cheerful cheerful
Flashing a big smile
That’s a perfect sign
That they’re feeling fine

Furry happy monsters feeling glad
Furry happy monsters feeling glad
Furry happy monsters laughing

Something has gone wrong,
Sighing, sighing.
Faces have turned long,
Crying, crying.
Hear them sob and whine,
Tearful, tearful.
That’s a real good sign,
That they’re feeling glum.
Sad, sad times have come.

Furry sobbing monsters feeling sad.
Furry sobbing monsters feeling sad.
Furry sobbing monsters crying.

Come on monsters, you don’t have to cry,
we can be happy!
Furry happy monsters feeling glad.
Furry happy monsters feeling glad.
Furry happy monsters laughing.

Furry sobbing monsters feeling sad.
Furry sobbing monsters feeling sad.
Furry sobbing monsters crying.

Furry happy monsters feeling glad.
Furry happy monsters feeling glad.
Furry happy monsters laughing.

Monsters, Happy, Monsters
Monsters, Happy, Monsters
Monsters, Happy, Monsters
Monsters, Happy, Monsters
Track Name: Cheer Down (George Harrison)
I can see by your grin
That you're trembling within
It's all over town, cheer down
And the smile on your face
Is sometimes out of place
Don't mind, no frowns, cheer down.

If your hair should fall
If your shares should crash
You'll get by even without getting a rash

There's no tears to be shed
I'm gonna love you instead
I want you around, cheer down.

When your teeth drop out
You'll get by even without taking a bite

If your dog should be dead
I'm gonna love you instead
The world loves a clown, cheer down.
I want you around, cheer down
Track Name: September Gurls (Big Star)
September girls do so much
I was your Butch and you were touched
I loved you, well, never mind
I've been crying all the time
December boy's got it bad
December boy's got it bad

September girls, I don't know why
How can I deny what's inside
Even though I'll keep away
They we'll love all our days
December boy's got it bad
December boy's got it bad

When I get to bed, late at night
That's the time she makes things right
Ooh when she makes love to me

September girls do so much
I was your Butch and you were touched
I loved you, well, never mind
I've been crying all the time
December boy's got it bad
December boy's got it bad
December boy's got it bad, woo ooo
Track Name: Daydream (Lovin' Spoonful)
What a day for a daydream
What a day for a daydreamin' boy
And I’m lost in a daydream
Dreamin' ‘bout my bundle of joy
And even if time ain’t really on my side
It’s one of those days for takin' a walk outside
I’m blowin’ the day to take a walk in the sun
And fall on my face on somebody's new mowed lawn

I've been havin’ a sweet dream
I been dreamin’ since I woke up today
It’s starrin’ me and my sweet dream
'Cause she's the one that makes me feel this way

And even if time has passing me by a lot
I couldn't care less about the dues you say I got
Tomorrow I'll pay the dues for droppin’ my load
A pie in your face for bein' a sleepy bulltoad

And you can be sure that if you're feelin’ right
A daydream will last along into the night
Tomorrow at breakfast you may pick up your ears
Or you may be daydreamin' for a thousand years

What a day for a daydream
Custom made for a daydreamin' boy
And now I’m lost in a daydream
Dreamin ‘bout my bundle of joy
Track Name: Perfect Circle (R.E.M.)
Put your hair back, we get to leave
Eleven gallows on your sleeve
Shallow figure, winner's paid
Eleven shadows way out of place
Standing too soon, shoulders high in the room
Standing too soon, shoulders high in the room
Standing too soon, shoulders high in the room

Pull your dress on and stay real close
Who might leave you where I left off?
A perfect circle of acquaintances and friends
Drink another, coin a phrase
Heaven assumed, shoulders high in the room
Heaven assumed, shoulders high in the room
Heaven assumed, shoulders high in the room

Try to win and suit your needs
Speak out sometimes but try to win
Standing too soon, shoulders high in the room
Standing too soon, shoulders high in the room
Standing too soon, shoulders high in the room
Standing too soon, shoulders high in the room
Standing too soon, shoulders high in the room
Track Name: Draggin' the Line (Tommy James)
Making a living the old, hard way.
Taking and giving my day by day.
I dig the snow and the rai nand the bright sunshine.
I'm draggin' the line (draggin' the line).

My dog Keebler eats purple flowers.
We ain't got much, but what we've got's ours.
We dig snow and the rain and the bright sunshine.
Draggin' the line (draggin the line).

I feel fine.
I'm talking about peace of mind.
I'm gonna take my time.
I'm getting to good times.
Draggin' the line (draggin the line).

Loving a free and feeling spirit.
Hugging a tree when you get near it.
Digging the snow and the rain and the bright sunshine.
I'm draggin' the line (draggin the line).
Draggin' the line (draggin' the line).

I feel fine.
I'm talking about peace of mind.
I'm gonna take my time.
I'm getting to good times.
Draggin' the line (draggin the line).